Simple Ways To Help Father’s Bond With Baby

“Dad a son’s first hero; a daughter’s first love.” – Unknown

There is also a saying it takes two to tango. It took you two to create this beautiful, precious bundle of joy. To some father’s, bonding begins as soon as they hear the first heartbeat – just as you (mom). They rub your belly and talk to the baby just as you do. To others, it can take the arrival of the baby for bonding to begin and to others longer. Interesting enough many father’s do not share this part of their parenting journey. I wonder why? But many father’s take on the role of caring after the birth of the baby so their spouse can recover from delivery. If all he he does it empty the diaper pail, or do the laundry when you are breastfeeding; that can prolong his bonding time with the baby. So this is what I will suggest,

  • Get A Carrier/Sling: All babies love to be held or carried. They feel much more comfortable in your arms than the crib or bassinet. YOU can’t blame them for being in an enclose space (womb) all this while and that is why they feel attached to you. It is not realistic to carry your baby all day. You will like to use your hands for other things. A carrier/sling is your best buddy at this stage. It allows you to carry your baby whiles keeping your hands free to do other things around the house. Having dad wear a sling will be helpful. That way he can take the baby for evening strolls or around the house to help with their bonding time. It also provides you the mom some “me time”. You can catch on nap!
  • Bath-Time: Dad has been at work all day – literally. I usually ask my hubby when he is half way home so I can prep bath time essentials for him. Evening bath is a favorite of his. He has always enjoyed it with our first born and now with Eazy. This moment gives him and Eazy the chance to have fun and play whiles attend to my oldest daughter. Since this is part of our bedtime routine, eventually Eazy will most of the time need his dad to have that moment with before bedtime. Also when I do go put Eazy to sleep, my hubby gets our daughter ready for bed and reads her bedtime story most of the time. It has become a tradition between he and the kids. Such an unbreakable bond.
  • Get Him Involved: I honestly do not know how to stress this enough. This is something you need to do from the on set. Not when your baby is a month or two before you do this because at the stage your baby is in, your baby has come to prefer you more than anybody. You do not have to stop breast-feeding to make dad have a bonding time with baby. Express the milk, so dad can take over a certain time in the day to feed. But if you do not want to pump, then you can ask dad to change diapers. As the baby lays on the changing table, dad and baby will interact leading them to have their bonding moment.
  • Special Moment: It is a natural thing for us to want to be involved in something fun someone is doing. If dad and baby are engaging in activity, leave them alone to have their bonding time. I know it can be tempting toes them giggling and you want to join in the fun. Let them be because you have been with baby and this is his moment to bond with his baby too.
  • Think Before You Speak: We women were created or made for this – motherhood. It is unnatural for dads. So if dad wore the baby diaper a wrong way or wore the baby’s bodysuit inside out or wore the baby different color of clothes from what you thought he would have put on the baby; It is okay. Think well before criticizing him. Some men will avoid diaper changing, or dressing up baby to avoid you pin pointing little little things. And that will make your load at home more. Also as the child grows, their needs increases it. Remember you will eventually have another child, if you want to. So having dad have these moment with the child will be so helpful in the long run. For instance in a week, my daughter will need my assistance probably 2-3x. There are times I’m like “wow she really is daddy’s girl”. I am thankful for it because how will I juggle a 3yr old and a baby whiles I have a husband at home?
  • Make Time For Him: I kept this for last because this is something we all as mums tend to do. Using the baby as an excuse most of the time lol. But remember before there was a baby, there was JUST YOU TWO. It is normal to be both tired and not have quality time as before but try to make time for him. When the baby goes down for a nap, text him and ask how his day is gong so far. Ask if he has had lunch and if you can surprise with lunch at work if you can. Ask him how he is feeling, you will be surprised of the things men finds it hard to bring out during this new stage because they do not want to overwhelm you the more but he is human and needs to be heard. Show him that you care. Moreover do not forget to tell him of how good of a father he is.

I hope this is helpful to any parent or mom-to-be out there. Help you spouse out. Do not make your spouse feel left out. It is both you your baby. Have him involved in everything. Even for checkups ask him if he wants to come if he can ask permission from work. If you will have to label babies food for him to know what he is feeding the baby at the moment, do it. Do not think, there is no need to have him him involved. As I said , you will be surprised of the things your spouse will share with you upon babies arrivals, if you both sit and talk of the changes and how to work on them. On that note, share with us by commenting on ways your spouse bond with baby. Till we meet on another blog post do take care guys.

 

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Negative Impact Of Social Media On Body Image & Relationships’

“Social media has created jealous behavior over illusions. Sadly some are envious of things, relationships & lifestyles that do not even exist.”

I recently conducted this poll “Do you ever feel like getting of the gram?” on my Instagram Dela. And 75% said yes and gave reason as to why. What I got from their response was the PRESSURE. I use to think peer pressure only existed in our teenage years but no it still lingers around regardless of your age. If you spend even just half of 30 minutes scrolling through your instagram feed, you could be unintentionally damaging your body image or relationship.

Influencers are meant to get us to try something – beauty, skin care, diet, workout etc. “Bad influence” is when you are constantly spending time looking at fitness influencers and models on instagram and that can have a negative influence on your self-esteem. You are more likely to be unhappy with your own body. It can also predict other mental health such as disordered eating and depression. It is okay to derive “fitspo” from an influencer because you want to stay in shape or lose weight. But if you are looking for looking sake and you are not doing anything about it please avoid it.

Should we delete our IG accounts? And that takes me back to the poll I conducted. This was some of my followers response and with their consent I share a text from their response.

“All these people sharing negative stuff and fake bodies”

“I need a break most times from social media when I catch myself wishing I looked like this and that….”

  • BODY IMAGE: I remember after having my first child, I felt I had to snap back ASAP because that was what I was constantly seeing. It has somewhat become a NORM. I had a negative influence on my own body. A body that was a space to nurture a healthy human till the time is right for he/she to come into this world. So instead of me being more appreciative of having a healthy baby, I was trying to snap back to please some folks I do not even know. Some of your favorite websites has only women with COCA – COLA bottled shape. Making it harder for you to even shop for clothes anymore. I once saw on my twitter feed a tweet from a woman and I paraphrase “Well shaped women are the only ones who are able to keep men”… Yes! you read that right. Meanwhile someone might be going through something in their relationship – could be quick to get upset or has a plain bad attitude. But because she saw this tweet and she is probably as small as me, she might feel the PRESSURE to go loan money or wipe her savings just to get implants cos apparently that is what can save her relationship. My dear sisters please do not let this be you. Instagram has become the worst app for your mental health. Most especially in relation to body image. So please love the skin and body you are in. If you feel the need to stay in shape or lose wight, do it for you and for your health and that is real BODY GOALS.
  • RELATIONSHIP GOALS:  Not all that glitters is diamond. I do hope that in the back of your mind, you remember that what you see on social media is the happy space people are in. No one will post a picture or video of their painful moment. But because you see their lifestyle, you assume they are laying in a bed of roses. Well, you do not get a perfect rose without coming into contact with a thorn. I have come across numerous post that makes me wish and hope that my sisters will not blindly follow what this person is saying. Once someone said “If he takes you to McDonald’s for dinner, that ain’t the one sis.” REALLY!!? My dear sisters, you know your man better. Appreciate what you have and please TRY not to compare. If he RESPECTS YOU, LOVES YOU, COMMUNICATE, TALK ABOUT HIS PLANS WITH YOU FIRST, PRAYS WITH YOU & PROTECTS YOU; Who cares where you guys go for dinner? Would you rather have a man who will take you to fancy places then as soon you guys sat in the car to go home he hits you or abuses you emotionally, physically and mentally, or a man who gives you all that he has with the above mentioned in caps Do not do things to post for LIKES. 

Also, you get to choose who to follow. Your feed affects your mental health and self-esteem. Follow accounts that brings smile on your face and makes you  feel content about life and unfollow accounts that always gets you questioning if your boobs needs some lifting, nose job, butt worked on or if your man  or woman is competent ENOUGH. Follow some new people who promote body-positivity and those who keep it real with relationship talks. Another cool thin is you can block certain hashtags too.


I hope this “short” blog post in some way makes you show appreciation to your skin tone, curves, lips – your BODY, life and relationships. If you also have any advise to anyone feeling this negative influence from social media and how you curb such effect, please comment below. Till we meet on another blog post, do take care.

Things You Should Stop Worry About As A New Parent

“My favorite piece of advice for a new parent is there is no one right way to do something. Trust your instincts. If we all spent a less time judging others and ourselves, imagine how much more time we’d have to simply enjoy what is really important – our families.” – Baby Loving Mama

It’s been a while I blogged about anything baby and parents related. I figured why not have a little pep talk with my online moms, dads and parents with my little two cents. I’m a mother of two. My first three and second four months. Being a new parent is exciting. But to be honest, being a first time parent can be scary. You want to do everything right to keep your beautiful bundle of joy protected, healthy and happy. So it is natural to worry if you are doing everything right. There are some things you can probably stop worrying about.

  • What Other People Think: Raise your hand if you would have a couple of hundred thousands dollars in your account by now if you’ve been bombarded with when and how to do things as a parent? I guess that is us all lol. Everyone has an opinion about when to potty train, wean your baby off the boobs or Binky, put your baby on a schedule, when to return to work or stay at home. It’s okay to take advise but weigh it out and study your baby. If an opinion isn’t related to your child’s health, why stress over it? What really matters is what you and your spouse think. You cannot please everyone. Trust your instincts and do what is best for you and your family.
  • Doing Everything Perfectly: You probably know of a parent who makes all his or her baby’s food, knits outfits or even can do both and always look put together. That is not a rule it is an exception. As parents there will be good days and some days you will wonder if you are doing things right? You honestly do not have to do everything right to be a perfect mom, dad or parents. We learn through imperfections.
  • The Little Things: There will be days where you’ll eat junk food, laundry is piled up, sink is full of dishes and the house may not be tidy like it used to be when it was just you two. I cleaned my house, got laundry done and ironed the clothes by the end of the week. After my second baby, boy oh boy! My sink gets full quickly, laundry keeps piling, and the energy to cook sometimes isn’t there so I end up eating out, wait a week more to do laundry, then wash dishes before bed. Unlike washing them right after we are done eating. It is not worth it to stress about the little things. Learning to chill little bit can prevent you from feeling overwhelmed and help you focus on what matters.
  • Reaching Baby Milestones On Schedule: There are so many baby books and apps stating when your baby should start cooing, following a finger, sit down, crawl, talk, teeth, roll over etc. But babies have their own timeline. I do not bother my babies at all. You do what you do when you can. If you feel tired you will sleep. I do not put my babies on any schedule. Study your baby and they’ll show you their cues. If certain things are out of the ordinary you should definitely consult your baby’s pediatrician.
  • The Future: It is normal for any parent to worry if they are financially stable enough to cater for their children or if their children will go to the best schools or they will be good to their community. Enjoy the present and stop stressing about the future. One day your baby will grow and will leave for college, introduce you to someone they want to spend the rest of their lives with. Do not be so busy thinking about wanting the future to be PERFECT so much that you will end up missing out or witnessing some milestones or creating family traditions.

My dear moms, dads and parents enjoy your cute beautiful bundle of joy. Once again do what is best for you and your baby. I hope you enjoyed today’s blog. Till we meet again on another blog post. Do take care friends.

Forgiveness

“As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison.” – Nelson Mandela

Hello there! Welcome to another blog post. As promised this is a follow-up to previous blog Beauty Marks. Forgiveness is a difficult thing to do. No lie, it is HARD. We all have a past, and for some it may be memorable and for others it may be horrible. Whatever the past look like, it is easy for us to indulge in the past and habour the pain in that moment. Find a way to minimize it, forgetting it lingers and is eating us up like a worm in an apple, causing it to rot. The way we use our memory will determine the detriment.

Forgiveness is a decision. Forgiveness is also a process. . You have to remind yourself to stay focused and committed to the process and you will get there. If you are going to build a new healthy friendships and relationships and marriage; you have to finish the unfinished business of old relationships. If you need to forgive someone, pray and ask God to help you forgive them. It is not easy. Once again it is a process. Healing is a step in the right direction to your beauty marks.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean that the person who hurt you “gets off the hook.” As the late Nelson Mandela said “……. I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison.” You do not want them to win or have power of you. You will end up constantly think about them whiles you can be using that time and energy into building your goals. Forgiveness also doesnt mean full reconciliation of a relationship. When trust has been broken, it must be rebuilt. However forgiveness means that as far as it depends on you, you are at PEACE with everyone.


Forgiveness is completely your choice. Ask yourself “Do I want to have inner peace and joy? or forever live with bitterness which can destroy any and everything that comes my way.? Till we meet again on another blog post. Do Take care. Also do not forget to check my IG Dela. I’ve highlighted a number of insta story post under LOVE just in case you need inspiration, healing or motivation.

Beauty Marks: Finding Healing In Your Scars

“Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength and move on.” – Henry Rollins

Hello guys. Welcome to another blog post. If you are new to my blog, welcome and hopefully you enjoy my content.

Today I want to talk about the different scars we have, identifying them and finding ways to recover from it. We all have scars – physically, mentally and emotionally. I have a scar. It runs from my left lower abdomen to my right. It is my permanent map marking the shortest distance. My scar is evidence of a situation that forever changed my life. If you read my blog post Miracle, you will understand. I probably should have surgery to have it fixed so I look more hot in a two piece swimwear. Scars are evidence or reminders of wounds we have endured. The scar no one else sees is on your mind, heart and soul. Mine paved the way for me to have and enjoy the greatest love – motherhood.

You may be living with internal scars. Maybe

  • A betrayal from a friend.
  • Something a father said or did not do.
  • Something unspeakable.
  • A dream crushed by a boss, coach, or spiritual leader you admired.
  • A promise your spouse did not keep.
  • Something unexpected.
  • A misunderstanding among business partners or neighbors.
  • Something unthinkable.

Whether it happened yesterday, today or twenty years ago, it still hurts. You will rather not visit the source of that hurt, yet it left a mark that is difficult to erase. It keeps reminding you are no longer whole. It causes memories to resurface when you least expect it. Memories you will rather forget. Most at time we think scars are not ugly. That is why we hide them minimize the thought. But no amount of vaseline, aloe vera, aquaphor, or mederma cream can make it fade away. Beauty marks are wounds that have been changed into purpose. Your wounds/scars can bless the world. How?

The first step in any healing process is identifying what hurts and why? If you are to be healed, you have to get to the root of what is wrong. Pain is the beginning of healing. Healing may not mean the pain will go right away at the snap of your fingers. When you heal from any scars/pain, you do not harbor resentment, hate, bitterness, acrimony, antipathy etc and that blesses the world because you still show love, care and kindness despite what you went through. You are still OPTIMISTIC. Yet we can be enticed to manage our pain by minimizing it. We convince ourselves that we can handle it. I am fine and things will go away eventually.

But if you are facing cheating in your marriage, you are likely to minimize your pain by convincing yourself that many marriages faces the same challenge. Uhm is your marriage or relationship like every other person? Our fingers are not equal so why accept what is wrong in your home or space? My dear friend, ignoring pain is not strength. It leads to greater injury. Like physical wounds, emotional wounds have symptoms. Symptoms you have to pay heed to. example,

  • You struggle to state your hurt.
  • Your thoughts bully you.
  • You avoid certain people and specific places.
  • You wound others.
  • You experience unresolved grief.
  • You have unhealthy attachment.

Take a moment to list down symptoms you have noticed and please consider what might have caused the wounds you carry today. Tell Jesus about your suffering and watch Him turn your wounds to a blessing to the world. You can tell a person you trust, such as a pastor, mentor, a close friend or a counselor. It is possible to be hurt even if others do not recognize your hurt. Deep down you know this. Just pause for a moment. In other for you to have beauty marks, to have someone look beyond what you have endured; you have to work on your road to recovery. Feel that inner peace and joy.


I will talk about forgiveness in the next blog post. We all can say we have healed. We are not minimizing our pain any longer. But you have to ask yourself HAVE YOU REALLY FORGIVEN & MOVED PAST IT? 1 thessalonians 5:23. I hope you enjoyed todays blog post. Till we meet again on another blog post. Take care

Three Simple Ways To Make Mornings Suck Less

“Either you run the day or the day runs you.” – Jim Rohn

Hello guys. Hope you all are doing well. Today’s post is quite a short one. And as the quote goes I would not want the day to run me. We all know how getting the required or suggested hours of sleep can be difficult. And just like how hunger can cause one to act out of the ordinary so does not getting enough sleep can make one grumpy, have a short attention span or even lose focus.

I have been consistent with a routine for a month now and it seems to make my mornings less grumpy. I hope it helps you out if you are looking for ways to have a GOOD MORNING.

  • Start Your Day Off Bright: The second thing I do in the morning is to expose bright natural light into my room by opening the curtains. That makes my body to get the signal that it is time to be awake. Trust me alarm clocks do not work. You will keep hitting that snooze button.
  • Turn Off Electronics An Hour Before Bed: After a busy day, I tend to go on Instagram to catch up on post I missed and most at times I end up scrolling and scrolling before I know an hour or two has gone by watching videos and laughing out loud. We do forget that blue light can delay the release of melatonin, which helps us fall asleep. That makes it harder to wake up. So try to turn your SCREEN OFF! You can do it *applause*
  • Not Sleeping In On Weekends: My grandmother woke up 5am everyday and her body got use to waking up at that hour whether she went to bed early or not so she advised to pick an hour in the morning and stick to it. Sleeping in late one morning and then trying to wake up early another time confuses your body, making it difficult to wake up and stay alert. Rather make it a habit to go to bed and wake up around the same time each day in other to get the required hours of sleep.

That been said, I hope this helps. Share it with someone you know how need to read this. Also when you wake up in the morning, SMILE for no reason. Be optimistic for the day. Till we meet again on another blog post, do take care guys. Don’t forget to click on my other social media icons to stay in touch.

My Birth Story: Twice A Miracle

“Don’t be ashamed of your story. It will inspire others.”

Writing a birth story can be intimidating, especially having a traumatic birth with my first. But sometimes gathering the courage is a powerful healing tool for many mums.

My husband and I have been married for five years. Our first child is 3yrs old now and if someone had told me I will have an energetic, bright and healthy child; I wouldn’t have believed it. In our second year of marriage we found out we were pregnant with our daughter. The joy and excitement to be parents was an amazing feeling. Had a healthy pregnancy. Wrote down a birth plan as to how I will want my delivery to go. On one faithful day, what turned out to be a regular check up turned out to be the day we had our daughter. The day we’ll officially call ourselves mom and dad. Everything was going on smoothly. I had dilated to about 3cm and was just hanging in in the bed; hubby holding my hands whiles I’m breathing in between contractions. Three hours after no further dilation, a funny sound started beeping from the electronic fetal monitor. The nurse rushed in and I started to panic. We were told our baby is in distress. Her heartbeat dropped but they will keep monitoring and I should stay calm and just keep doing the breathing exercise. All this while the pain of contractions haven’t really kicked in so no epidural yet. An hour after the nurses checked in, the beeping sound started again. And this time her heartbeat dropped two more times. My doc explained due to her heartbeat dropping we will have to have an emergency c-section. Immediately my heart sunk in. This is something I am trying to avoid. I have my whole birth planned out. I am going to ask for epidural when I can’t take the pain. Have my baby and get discharged home in peace. But nope, things went south! When her heartbeat dropped the third time, there was no time to waste so I was rushed in to the OR. I still had my jewelry on which is not suppose to happen but that explains how quickly our baby had to be taken out. Few minutes later, I heard the loudest cry although her umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck twice which explained why she was in distress. Such a FIGHTER! My heart was at peace but mind was at  battle with me. I felt defeated and disappointed that I didn’t get to experience having a vaginal birth. Woke up a few hours later to be told she was in the NICU due to the distress. I haven’t seen my baby yet and the time to go to the NICU to see my baby is over. I hardly slept and couldn’t wait for morning to come. To be honest, when I finally saw her, it was a bittersweet moment. I was happy to finally see the one I’ve carried for 9months and to call my child – my baby and on the other hand I felt like she didn’t deserve to have all these lights on her and tubes connected to her. She was tiny and fragile (6lbs and 3oz). I could only reach for my baby through a hole since she was in an incubator. *inserts crying emoji* I’m emotional at this point. Whiles patiently waiting to be able to hold her and start skin to skin, the doc walks in to explain to what happened to her; throwing all these medical jagons at me and at one point he said “she can have brain damage.” Say what!? It was an emotional rollercoaster. An hour later I was able to finally hold my.

My Bubbles

I said “this is mummy” and she smiled at me – tears of joy. And that is why her nickname is BUBBLES cos she is bubbly and energetic. But that feeling didn’t stay for long when I went back to the recovery room. I began to beat myself with questions as to where did I go wrong? Did something I ate cause it? Why wasn’t the cord detected during prenatal care? Was I simply naive and didn’t ask enough health questions about the baby during check-ups? I also felt like my birth was “done to me”. Finally three days after we were able to go home. Took me a while to recover from this incident.

And now we are in the second part of my second delivery experience. Hope you haven’t left yet :). Two years later, I found out I was pregnant. Excited! Yes we were – to give our daughter a sibling. This time around, I wanted things to be different. I wanted to feel what contractions is like and to go to the hospital when the contractions interval is close. I prayed and constantly hoped I do not have a c-section nor have my baby in the NICU. I even prayed for the hour in the day I wanted my son to arrive.

In terms of symptoms. I was nauseous the first trimester, constant heartburn throughout the pregnancy. Thanks to Canada Dry ginger-ale for helping with that. So, how did my labor start? It was a winter cold evening. We had dinner. Hubby & Bubbles were watching TV. I had gone for my final prenatal care that Monday of the week and was told I dilated 3cm and everything should be fine. Normally when you have a c-section and want to try a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean) you are asked to sign a consent form. Which I gladly did because we did not want to schedule a day for my baby’s arrival. We wanted him to arrive on the day my body is ready to have him out. Second reason was I had finals 3 days before his due date and did not want to be writing an exams post baby. I gave bubbles a bath and I began to feel some strong discomforts but thought it was Braxton hicks (false labor). I went ahead to type my response debate essay and was studying for finals in between because anything can happen and wanted to be prepared either way. Hubby went to put bubbles down to bed. He came back and I was still typing. Told him that I’m feeling some pain. He suggested, I time the contractions just so we know if it is false labor or not. Contractions started around 9pm. It was 14-13-20 mins apart – no biggy. Around 10pm it went from 20mins to 10-9-7 mins apart. At 12am contractions was 1 minute apart. That was when I told hubby, WE GOT TO GO!!! We got to the hospital, I was admitted right away. My cervix was checked and I had dilated to 5cm. I could not take the pain any longer. I was screaming on top of my lungs for an epidural, which was was administered right away. I got a side effect of it later. Started to feel cold and was shaking terribly. Things were moving so fast yet okay. Then as soon as we hit 8cm my son’s heartbeat started to drop again. I began to speak within, telling him to stay with me; we are almost close to 10cm and we can do it. But it dropped again and once again, I panicked, felt betrayed by my body and disappointed that I do not get to do this the natural way. I was taken to the OR and prepped for a cesarean. I whispered to my husband “I am sorry, I wasn’t strong enough” He wiped my tears and said “It is okay. He will be with us soon.” *sighs* . Few minutes later my son was out and I didn’t hear him cry. I called out my hubby and asked if everything is okay. He said he was okay. His umbilical cord was tied in a knot which explains why he was in distress. He had to be startled a little bit and there it was the loudest cry! Oh my! tears of joy. Also unlike his sister, He didn’t have to go to the NICU! And that’s why his nickname is EAZY! He really is a easy baby. Such a big boy! 7lbs and 9oz. He came on the day I wanted & hour I wanted (Friday; cos I’m a Friday baby☺️) What more could I ask for? He was right by my side. I guess that’s how I got the energy to write my final the following day on my hospital bed. Everything went smoothly during our stay. Couldn’t wait to be discharged home to see my big girl who’s a big sister now.

Felt grateful to hold you Eazy!

Hubby showed me pictures of their skin to skin moment and bubbles just staring at her brother in awe whiles holding him. Those pictures made my heart so full with extra LOVE. Lest I forgot whiles being cleaned up to be taken to the recovery room, I felt, my delivery was “done to me” once again. It might sound weird but birth was intended for us to be “doing it”. Based on other stories I have read; through “doing it” one discovers their strength (physically and mentally), patience and the ability to be flexible for their body to do it work naturally.

Having my second birth plan not go the way I wanted was a bummer but one that I am forever thankful and grateful for when I look on the bright side of things. What if there wasn’t the option of being able to have your baby through cesarean. Does that mean, one will carry a child for 9mths with the expectancy of seeing their child but are unable to see the baby? That is one double the heartache that I cannot imagine how I will recover from.

Writing my story is not to scare you off some of the complications that comes with delivery. Sometimes people get scared by birth stories and some, to a certain point decide not to have a child. But let me tell you; everyone’s story is different. You will not necessarily experience what I did but the point of sharing, is that, if you should find yourself in my shoes, it is okay to feel sad, broken or disappointed when your birth plan didn’t go as planned but on the other hand you find a light at the end of the tunnel. A light of thankfulness and gratitude that you get to hold your healthy child in your hands. Someone for you to look in the eyes and say YOU ARE WORTH THESE SCARS.


 

If I didn’t lose you yet and you read to the end, thank you. If you also do not mind, share with us your story. You can find healing through it and give hope to someone. Hope you liked it. If you did. Like the post and share with someone to encourage them or simply to read another birth story. Till we meet on another blog post. Take Care

How I Increase And Maintain Breastmilk Supply

“Breastfeeding is not always easy, but it is always worth it.”

Hello blog family. It has been a while I posted some content on here. I hope you have not abandoned me. I have been MIA because I was pregnant with my second child and got occupied with so much school stuff that I had to take a break. But I am back for good this time. If I don not show up on here, keep me accountable by hitting me up on my Instagram  Dela

Hopefully you do now get why I am writing about BREAST MILK. Breastfeeding is one difficult task. It is a whole job on its own. Some of you moms struggle with it and to others it is as easy as A B C. To be honest I struggled with it with my first child. I was sharing with my hubby a couple of days ago that I think the reason I struggled with it was because she was immediately sent to the NICU after birth. Woke up in the recovery room to be told that, did drain me emotionally, physically, and mentally. Cos

  • I had to have an emergency c-section and didn’t get to see my child till the next day because I could hardly walk.
  • Also to see her with cords and all those lights on her broke me down.

I was only able to breastfeed for three months. And to hear all these preaching about how breast-feeding is good for babies and babies who are breastfed have higher IQ, can make you feel really awful. You begin to question, so my child won’t be as smart because he or she is not breastfed? I hope much support is given to women who are trying to breastfeed but are unable to and to those who solely choose to give formula as well. At the end of the day a healthy baby is all we pray for whether been fed breast milk or formula. Do not get me wrong. If you can BREASTFEED as long as you can, please DO IT.

With my second child, he was right by my side. No NICU! So we got more time to have feeding sessions during the first day but his appetite got so big over night that he was on both breast milk and formula before we left the hospital. But when we got home, my milk flow went through the roof. I was so happy. So here is how I was able to increase and maintain my milk supply.

  • I drink 8 oz of water per day. I actually got a 24 oz bottle so 3-4 of it a day helped me.
  • I drank lots of soup. Peanut soup to be precise. I ate it with rice, fufu, omo-tuo (rice ball).
  • Also had my oatmeal and porridge with peanuts. Just as you would put blueberry’s.
  • I blended peanuts with Fante or Ga kenkey or ate it with gari (cassava flakes)
  • Drunk soy milk when I was craving for apple juice lol
  • Finally I put the child on the boobs often. Not all babies can latch well so when you pump, do check the speed of the pump you are using. It is supposed to suck as your child does. Speed and strength on the pump I use is 8 – 9 respectively. And whenever I pumped, I saved one in Medela bottle and another in Milk Storage Bag. So if I pumped 3x in a day, I will have 3 bags in freezer and 3 bottles in fridge. Now multiply that in a week. Hope it makes sense.
  • Last but not the least always massage your boobs whiles taking a warm bath. Pumping right after a warm shower or bath is also helpful or you could warm a neat washcloth, place it on your boobs for some time then pump.

I was pumping 3x a day but now 2x a day due to school. This is how much I have been able to accumulate in the freezer already. Which is a good place to store for long – 6 months.Breast Milk

Some of these food may not be known to you but notice the repetitive word in all of it was PEANUTS . I am aware that some people are ALLERGIC to peanuts so please do not take it, knowing it will affect your health.


I hope this information does help you moms. And If you know of any other ways one can increase their milk supply do share in the comment section below. Be kind and share this post with other moms out there. Till I catch you on my next blog post,

Take Care.